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| | William Ury, a world-renowned negotiator who worked with the White House to avert nuclear war with Russia, helped broker Colombia’s 2016 peace agreement with the FARC, and authored the bestseller Getting to Yes, knows firsthand that anger can hijack a conversation. Ury likes to say “When you’re angry, you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret.” I’ve certainly been guilty of launching into an anger-fueled rant that not only didn’t solve my problem, but actually made things much worse. Therapists Juli Frag aand and Hilary Jacobs Hendel say bottling up or suppressing your anger isn’t the answer either. Their advice, backed by research, is to try to understand your anger and what it's trying to tell you. That way, you can process the feelings and actually use your anger constructively. I know, easier said than done. Fortunately, there’s a step-by-step process that Fraga and Hendel guide their clients through – and you can try it on your own. You start by naming the emotion you’re feeling. Saying to yourself unapologetically “I’m angry!” or “I’m frustrated!” helps regulate your nervous system and can make you feel calmer. By step 4, you get to play out the fantasy of what your anger would like to say or do to the person who made you angry – in your head. It's a way to help you release this energy so that it doesn't hurt you or others. But don’t skip the steps in between. And if you have simmering rage that keeps coming back, like unresolved anger from your childhood, it’s a good idea to seek the support of a trained therapist. Here’s more about how to process anger and get what you really want. Plus: If you're often angry or irritable, you may be depressed |
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“Trying to explain what seeing a total eclipse is like is like trying to explain what sex is to a virgin. You won’t understand it until you see it,” said former NASA astrophysicist Fred Espenak in 2017, the most recent year a total solar eclipse was visible in parts of the United States. As with sex, it’s important to use protection when viewing a solar eclipse. Whether you live in the narrow path of the total eclipse coming April 8, or you’re hoping to peep the moon blocking part of the sun, you’ll need to take precautions, or risk serious eye damage. One easy way to protect your eyes is by wearing eclipse glasses. Eclipse glasses typically let through between 0.001% and 0.00005% of visible light, as NPR’s Joe Hernandez reports. But be wary of fakes. Test your pair by holding them up in front of a bright lamp or flashlight. If the light is invisible or very dim through the glasses, they’re legit. If you’re viewing the total eclipse, you’ll want to take them off during the few minutes of “totality” when the moon is smack dab between your line of vision and the sun. No glasses? You can use a pinhole projector or camera obscura, or even a colander to cast an image of the eclipse on the ground or a wall – without looking directly at the sun. Get the do’s and don'ts of eclipse viewing here. And check out this video for tips on how to make your own pinhole projector or camera obscura. Plus: For April's eclipse, going from 'meh' to 'OMG' might mean just driving across town |
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We hope you enjoyed these stories. Find more of NPR's health journalism online. All our best, Andrea Muraskin and your NPR Health editors |
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